Chats

Me: Back in 94, even the porn was done in ASCII art. They even made the pictures by using the first letter of the name of the body part they were drawing so there was no confusion. You know, like BBBBBBBBBNNN
Michael: What letter did they use for, you know, down there on a girl.
Me: Why, “P”, of course.
Michael: Why not “V”?
Me: Because it was porn. If they used “V” they would have to call it art!

Patrick: You always seem to find the flaw in my plan.
Princess Bethany: That’s because there is always a flaw in your plan.

Me: US Airways is so bad that they make Northwest Airlines look like Southwest Airlines.
Joann: That’s pretty bad.